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Wake

January 21, 2008

Initially, we had a somewhat shitty turnout. Jhaos, Alpheos, Jaertes & I were kinda all that there was. Eventually, a pair of Jaertes friends turned up, then Jethe and Daris came down, joined us for a while, then Jottos got a call from one of his friends – their party in V1 was getting broken up, and they wanted a place to end up – did he know of anything?

He briefly ran down the joke of our party, and roughly 10 minutes later, a whole horde of people were suddenly in our room, sort of getting the humour of Memmon’s “passing” … But after another drink or two and a few examples from us, they got in on the fullness of the joke, and telling outrageous lies of their own. The beer bong that arrived with one guy was obviously built from stolen car parts while hiking the Andes with Memmon. The girl whose party is was originally hadn’t been invited to our place by Jottos; Memmon had told her to come. Jhaos didn’t know that girl from sharing a program with her; Memmon had introduced them at a Gala Ball in Las Vegas while attempting to seduce a pair of transevestite prostitutes in order to steal a one-of-a-kind daimond-encrusted toilet seat. (I kid you not. Someone told this story with a straight face.) Someone else didn’t get into UW ’cause of marks, they got in because Memmon hacked the database and changed their application status to “accepted” in exchange for a trunkload of vegan Pringles.

It went on from there.

The night went on, some people came, some people left, some people came, some people left – most of the regulars failed to show, though Jethe & Daris were there, as well as Alcyone, and a few others who just wandered through, Alpheos, for instance, as well as Ephaltes and Amalthea.

Vetes showed up halfway through, 11:00 ish, and joined the party, having more than his typical 3 drinks before eventually succumbing to booze-goggles (Sorry about the steriotypes, but Our Asian can usually do 3 or 4 drinks before being Done For The Night.) and sitting down to make moves on a stunningly unspectacular girl at the party. While he was up to that, Alcyone & I were chatting up another gent who turned out to be from Vancouver’s North Shore, and knew some common folks to us, and when I mentioned having attended The Wall, to see if he knew any of those, a couple of people on the far side of the room had apparently gone to T.O.’s incarnation of the same. We compared fairies & gnomes & spirits notes & jokes, and enjoyed that, then, around 11:45, Jaertes took off to his room to drop, leaving me and our inebriated romeo as the sole hosts of our party.

Still awesome, though. Still fun. Just around midnight, Demeter showed up with Aello, a boyfriend, and a cadre of other randos who joined the party, briefly, before taking off upstairs to talk to Jethe (And apparently, I learned later, make a Royal Nuisance of themselves in his flat.); I let them onto the floor, then wandered back down to ours, inadvertently locking them off our floor in the process.

But the party went on. We’d long since lost track of our original purpose, simply filling the house with people dressed in black, partying with a false coffin in the middle. Memmon was forgotten, and in that, I supposed we succeeded in the purpose of the Wake, even more than intended.

A few hours of hugely entertaining moments, none of which are genuinely worth recording, and then it was time to wind down. The dons showed up to throw everyone out of the flat, all three, and then; then the finest, most awesome moment of the night happened.

Demeter, Antaios and I had talked about going to smoked spliff, and Aello hit the WC before we took off, and was still in it when the Dons came. The three of them were in our entranceway, forming a sort of square facing our living room with me taking to corner closest the middle of our flat, and I was doing what I could to keep their attention on me rather than the swarm of underagers surreptitiously stuffing booze into bags after being notified that it was time for them to leave. While this was happening, Aello walked out of the washroom, visible to me, but behind / blocked by the wall to the Dons. I could see him, they couldn’t. I could plainly see that in one hand, he had a bottle of wine, and a baggie of spliff in the other. I saw the look on his face, and saw disaster. As casually as possible, I tell him to go into my room to look for my coat, that I’d grab Demeter and meet him there in a moment, and then we could go. “Sure thing!”, he says, then started walking … towards me. Not my room. To me, and towards the three Dons, still with the bottle in one hand and the baggie in the other. …Ohshitohshitohshitohshit…. No… As he passes Aiola, our floor Don, he exclaims ridiculously loudly “LETS DO THIS!” waving the baggie and the bottle proudly for all to see. FUCK. As he finishes his exclamation, he realizes his mistake, and just keeps going, past the Dons, past me, and off to the far end of the room. A moment of awkward silence hangs over me and the three Dons. The other two look horrified and shocked. Aiola rolls her eyes and shoots me a look of “…Idiot…” And I just started laughing. Full facepalm, bent in two laughing so unbelievably hard. Aiola starts laughing, less so, and the other two merely awkwardly chuckle along, a little. After I recover, I turn as casually as possible, still snickering, to remind the room that they need to take off, then turn back to the Dons, now composed, and thank them for coming, offer them a drink, “just for tradition’s sake”, and then usher them out assuring them that I’d clear everyone out and see to it that they make it out of the building rather than hanging about in the halls.

Dodged a fucking bullet there. If Aiola hadn’t been there, Aello would have been shicanned for sure, and likely myself and possibly Demeter as well. But, as I’ve said before, I’m not just nice to Aiola ’cause she’s awesome, it’s cause it buys me Slack, and every now and again, I need to cash that Slack in. This was one such moment, and boy did it ever pay off.

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